I don’t remember most of the details of that game, but certain events of that day are indelibly stamped in my mind.

Back when I was younger and fitter I used to play field hockey. If you scoff at that, then I challenge you to play a competitive game some time… on second thoughts, you’re probably not man (or woman) enough

I’ve forgotten now who we were playing against but I remember that our team captain was having a terrible day. Three or four times he had close range shots at an open goal and missed. Another three or four times he had clear shots on target and completely fluffed them up – and it was showing in his attitude and demeanor.

Time and time again he got into a position to score and then, for no apparent reason his shot would go wide or bobble slowly forward and be easily intercepted by by an opposition player. His frustration and anger with himself were threatening to bubble over but, for the sake of the team he was supposed to be leading, he did his best to hold himself together.

I know exactly how he was feeling because that man was me – and if it wasn’t for the fact that the rest of my team were scoring goals and we were up by a comfortable margin, the pressure would probably have just about destroyed me.

Despite my obvious lack of co-ordination and ability that day, I did what I was supposed to be doing and put myself in the right position on the field time after time and finally, minutes before the end of the game, there I was back in front of the goal mouth, about three yards out, just where I’d been so many times already that day.

Neil was playing for us that game. I don’t remember his last name or anything much about him but he was in his late forties or early fifties and had once been one of the game’s great players. The rumor around the club was that he had scored more goals for England in international competition than any other man in history. I can’t confirm that but I can tell you that even as the oldest guy on the field, he was a devastating goal scorer. It was simply amazing to watch him.

So there we were, the clock ticking away, I was in position as I was supposed to be and Neil had the ball. He rounded the last defenders and deftly sidestepped the keeper, leaving the keeper stranded and the goal mouth open. The rest of us were mere spectators wondering in what flashy way he was going to bury the ball in the back of the net… until the unbelievable happened.

Instead of taking the shot, this natural goal scorer, a man with a built-in predatory instinct calmly slid the ball sideways across the field to the end of my stick.

I remember looking up at him wide-eyed, with fear coursing through every vein, every muscle, every nerve in my body. It shows how well he had single-handedly defeated the other team because I had time to stare at him and ask incredulously, “Why are you giving the ball to me?”

Neil didn’t say anything, he just smiled – and I knew it was now or never. I looked down at the ball, reached back with my stick and…

Once again, I mis-hit it.

The ball bobbled and bounced off at a tangent yet again only this time the angle was not quite big enough to miss the goal and the ball rolled over the line.

At last, I had scored! I couldn’t believe it.

Scoring that goal didn’t take away all of my frustration, but it did send waves of relief washing over me.

As we jogged back to the half-way line, Neil grabbed my shoulder from behind in a vice-like grip, then patted me on the back and smiled as he jogged past.

He may have said something, I’m not sure, but words weren’t necessary. He’d done something far greater than any words could ever have done.

He’d believed in me.

Despite all evidence to the contrary, despite his far superior ability, despite my attitude, despite everything else, Neil believed in me and gave me another chance.

I hope that I can be like Neil with other people. I hope that instead of giving up on them and just doing it myself, I can be ready and willing to slide them the ball and let them have another shot at it.

I have no idea where Neil is now, or if he’d even remember this but Neil, if you ever read this, I just want to say THANK YOU for teaching me a great life lesson out on that Hockey field. I hope I can do the same for someone else one day.

I’ve had a couple of people comment to me over the last couple of days that I’m a prayer warrior, or something along those lines.

I’m sorry to disappoint you guys but it’s just not true.

You see, a prayer warrior is someone who senses the call of the Spirit to pray and does so both often and with a strong desire to.

I’m not that person. I have the hardest time praying. Really, you don’t want to hear me pray out loud, it’s not pretty. I pretty much have to force myself to pray and even then, Irush through my prayers and get distracted very easily.

It’s only in times that I set aside to fast and pray that I come anywhere close to what should be a ‘normal’ prayer life.

Now I can already hear some of you objecting but let me continue…

My gift is that of Pastor.

I’m not saying that arrogantly or to boast, it’s just a fact. God gives each of us gifts, mine happens to be the gift of pastor.

The thing is, having this gift means I see things differently than many people I see things in a way that makes me think “What can I do to release the Church to do this?”

The apostles, prophets, pastors, teachers, and evangelists are there to equip the saints to do the work. (Ephesians 4:12)

I picture a pastor in two ways:

1) As a shepherd (the literal translation). The shepherd leads the sheep to the pasture, he guides them. Very rarely does he actually carry them, rather he shows them the way, He also NEVER eats the grass for the sheep or grows wool or fattens himself up for slaughter. That’s the job of the sheep. The shepherd just shows the way and keeps them on the right track.

2) A sports coach. Any team needs a coach. The coach shows the players what needs to be done and equips them to do it but then he sends them out onto the field to actually play the game. Yes he shouts encouragement and correction from the sidelines but he doesn’t suit up play the game with them. That’s not his (or her) role.

Pastors, like anyone else have to listen to God and obey. If God calls me to pray for you, I do it – but that doesn’t make me a prayer warrior, it means I’m obeying the call of God and demonstrating what it looks like when we pray for each other.

People often tell me I have the gift of encouragement. That is SO not true. The gift of encouragement means that you have a supernatural ability to be able to speak encouraging words in any situation. I can’t do that. I can give you a “woo hoo” and a slap on the back every now and then but I’m lost when it comes to real need.

The way I encourage is that of the coach shouting from the sidelines and I do it:

a) because I know everyone needs it and

b) because I want to demonstrate what encouraging people looks like and how easy it is.

This post really isn’t about me though… it’s about your pastor.

All too often, the church sees that something needs to be done and expects ‘the pastor’ to do it, when that’s really not his/her job (or gift). Your pastor/minister is there to equip you and the rest of your congregation to do the work of ministry. Their gift is very specific and there are people in your congregation who have the gifts to do whatever it is that needs to be done.

The Church needs to stop looking at the ‘leaders’ as the workers and everyone else as passive bystanders and start thinking about ourselves as a body in which all the parts have an essential function and are all neccessary. If any of us are being passive and doing nothing then the whole body of Christ suffers.

Go, do what God is calling you to do. Don’t give it to your pastor to do – as Nike says “JUST DO IT!”

Oh and you could read 1 Corinthians 12 if you need more convincing!

I hope that I will be able to put my kids in little league sports in the next few years, I truly do. I’d love for them to have that experience.

More important to me than that though is teaching them to love and serve the poor, sick and needy. If I have to choose between the two, I know which I will do.

I am disturbed by the comments I hear from some people about how important it is to get your kids into little league and what a bad parent I would be to not sign them up for every sport in the book.

Here’s my response to those people:

• You think that I am depriving my children by not signing them up for every sport I can find
• I know I’m teaching them valuable lessons by letting them go out and minister to the homeless with me

• You think that children need to be part of a sports team to learn teamwork
• My children learn teamwork by working together to make and distribute lunches to the homeless

• You say that you want your child to enjoy the thrill of hitting a home run
• I want my children to experience the thrill of leading one of our homeless friends to Christ

• You don’t want your children to miss out on part of the American experience
• I don’t want my children to forget what’s REALLY important

• You spend hours cheering your children on from the bleachers
• I hold my children’s hands as we walk across the tracks to reach tent city

• You spend all kinds of money on league fees and uniforms
• I teach my children to give even out of the little that we have

• You hope that sports will help your children develop an aggressive ‘go-getter’ attitude
• I hope that my children will learn to love the unlovable and care for the rejected

• Your children will have memories that will last for a lifetime
• My children will have memories that will last for all eternity

As I said, if I can, I’ll let my kids get involved in all kinds of sports… but if I have to choose, then there’s just no contest!

I was surrounded by brothers and sisters in Christ, worshipping God. The worship team on the platform were talented, gifted and totally given over to worshipping their Lord. 

Standing there amongst my fellow believers, I should have been at peace. I should have been able to let go and fully immerse myself in the worship but something held me back….

Why me? I asked myself. 

Why would God pick me to lead anyone, to do anything when he has such talented people at his disposal.

Looking around I saw people with incredible gifts. People who, the more I knew about each one of them, the more I discovered amazing talents and abilities which they had hidden beneath the surface.

Looking at them I felt small. Very small. Why me? I wondered. What could I possibly have to offer compared to any one of them.

Why me?

I’m not writing this because I want to hear a bunch of platitudes, I’m writing it because I wrestled with those thoughts for a long time that day and I know I’m not alone in thinking them.

Why me?

I have nothing to offer, nothing to give that any one of the people in this room could not do a hundred times better.

So why me?

The answer comes from God:

Because I choose who I will use for each task.

Because I know who is right for this work, in this time, in this place.

Because I know what is needed and who I have gifted with just the right mix of gifts.

Because I do not see things as men do.

Because I alone am God.

I know that God has placed me here, doing this, right now, today and I cannot fathom why… but in the end, I don’t need to know why. I just need to know the answer to these two questions:

1. Does God love me and does He love the people He has sent me to?
2. Can I trust Him?

It always comes down to those two questions. Does God love me? and can I trust him? If you can know deep in your heart that the answer to those two questions is ‘YES’ then there is never anything else to question, never any need to worry or fear, never any doubt. 

God loves me and I trust him.

…and that’s the bottom line. The foundation.

Why me? I really have no idea. Truly, I wouldn’t pick me. God did though, and that’s all I need to know.

The person out there who regularly reads my blog will know that last week I posted a list of the five people who have had the greatest influence on me in my life. The purpose of this was to let them know, for a start, to thank them and to honor them. I got the idea from Michael Hyatt at Thomas Nelson Publishers. They have come up with the project as an interesting way to promote a new book that they are publishing. 

The book is called The Noticer: Sometimes, all a person needs is a little perspective. and is written by Andy Andrews (which is an awesome name, imho) I have not read the book so I cannot recommend it but the promotion project goes like this:

The Noticer Project. The goal is to launch a worldwide movement of people who will take a few minutes to “notice” five of the most influential people in their life.

Noticing these five people can be private—just a letter or an email—or public—writing a blog post, updating your Facebook or Twitter status or joining The Noticer Project Facebook Group. Regardless, we want to encourage people to notice the people who have had the most influence in their life now, rather than waiting until a wedding, graduation, or—God forbid—a funeral. {Taken from Michael Hyatt’sblog}

This week I want to ‘notice’ five people who have maybe not been around all of my life but who are currently influencing me strongly:

1) Robert Orvis. Robert is my brother in law and lives with his wife and son in a glorified shed in our back yard. Actually, it’s not very glorified at all. It’s a shed. Robert is living a life which is teaching me a lot about financial stewardship and not giving in to this culture and what it tells us we should have or seek after. He also says some incredibly profound things. Not all the time, but often enough for me to be totally in awe of his depth. Robert should be leading our church. I have yet to understand why God gave me the job!

 2) My wife. Yeah, she was in my all-time five but I’m a married man and much of my life now revolves around this wonderful woman. I cannot think of an area of my life that my wife has not profoundly influenced mental, emotional, physical or spiritual. She is my rock, my faithful companion. She supports me (and corrects me) she loves me and she has brought stability to my life in a way that I didn’t think was possible. She is an amazing woman of God.

3) Rob Vanden Bos. Rob and his family heard the call of God some years ago to become missionaries to the Philippines. After going out there for a year, they returned and sold everything. Literally everything down to their retirement accounts to fund them starting a new life in the wilds of the Philippines as full time, permanent missionaries. Rob, his wife (Chris) and their family live a lifestyle which I cannot yet even imagine. They rely on God in a way most of us could never even dream of. They work harder than most of us could live through and they do it all to serve their Lord and the people He has sent them to. Rob is my role-model. The apostle Paul told us to imitate him as he imitated Christ. Rob could tell us the same thing, but he’s way too humble.

4) John Wiley. John is amazing. Incredible. Wonderful (and he’ll hate me saying that because he’s too humble). I first heard of John through a video about what God is doing through him in his community of Raytown, MO. John is such an inspiration to me, I wish he wasn’t 2000 miles away and I wasn’t so flaky. If you ever get a chance, check out what’s going on at his church, The River Christian Fellowship, and their history. If you want to see a modern day true-life story of God moving through his faithful, you don’t need to look any further than them! John has rocked my world in a big way!

5) Michael Hyatt. Mr Hyatt is CEO of Thomas Nelson. I do not know him personally but through his blog and his tweets I am learning so much from him about what it means to be in the world but not of the world. What do I mean? Well, Mr Hyatt uses modern technology, in particular electronic communication, in a way that we can all learn from. He is a in charge of a big, big company, has many employees and an incredibly busy schedule but unlike many CEO’s who would cut themselves off from ‘the little people’, Mr Hyatt makes himself open, transparent and available. He is not a worldly CEO. He is in the world as a CEO but the way he lives and acts and communicates is DEFINITELY not of the world. I am learning (or trying to learn) a lot from him.

So over to you…. who are your five people who you want to “notice”?

Post a blog on your site or tweet or add a facebook note or Myspace or something. Hey, and why not leave a note here when you’ve done it so we can see who has been an influence in your life.

One of my favorite leadership quotes reportedly comes from one of the great leaders of our time, Nelson Mandela:

“You see, when there is danger, a good leader takes the front line. But when there is celebration, a good leader stays in the back room. If you want the cooperation of human beings around you, make them feel that they are important. And you do that by being humble.”

This comes from a man who led by example, who suffered for what he believed and who never gave up even in the face of more adversity than you and I can probably imagine. It’s often the seemingly small things that great leaders say which can teach you the most about them and about how to lead well.

I recently started reading the blog of Michael Hyatt, Chief Executive Officer of Thomas Nelson publishers.

I have gained a great deal of respect for Mr Hyatt having been in communication with him briefly and, last week, he published a blog post explaining a leadership shakeup within the organization which he heads up. As part of that post, Mr Hyatt said: 

 

Image of Michael Hyatt from michaelhyatt.com

Today I announced a few changes in our leadership structure. These changes are designed to better leverage my strengths and also make our team more nimble and competitive in the current economy.As Thomas Nelson’s Chief Executive Officer, I will now focus on the three areas where my team collectively agrees I add the most value:

1. Vision and strategy;
2. Author relations and product development; and
3. External communications.

All three of these aspects of our business totally energize me. In order to focus on them, my direct reports will be reduced from nine to five:…… {click to read more}

 

This completely blew me away. I have found that a leader who is prepared to give up control of anything is one of a very rare breed. 

In my experience, many if not most businesses would benefit from actually discovering the strengths of their employees and, as Mr Hyatt puts it, ‘leverage’ those strengths.

This issue is smaller the further down the chain of command you go as people at the bottom tend to be positioned more where their strengths are but as people rise in authority and power they tend to take, or be given, responsibilities which they are not gifted for. 

It was so refreshing to me to see a man in charge of such a large business being realistic about himself and being willing to give duties and power away to benefit the whole organization.

I personally know of some businesses where the person at the top desperately needs to do that but flatly refuses because they have control issues – and it is harming their business. Some people just want to hold all of the strings.

I couldn’t help but see how this also relates strongly to churches in the same way and in a slightly different way.

How many churches have you seen where the Pastor, church board or some group within the ministry have too much power and refuse to give over responsibility for certain things to people who are called, gifted and might actually know what they are doing?

Conversely, how many churches have you seen where the Pastor or other people in the church are given responsibilities which are way outside of their abilities and giftings and then find that church members get upset when they do a less than perfect job?

We can all learn something from Michael Hyatt.

Repeat after me: “I will now focus on the areas where my team collectively agrees I add the most value.”

Corporate speak for: I’m going to do the things I do best and leave the other jobs for someone who can do them better.

Be the one who is willing to let go of some of the strings or be part of the team who helps someone see what they need to let go of, either way you will be leading well.

If you don’t then it’s most likely that you’re being a hinderance, it’s as simple as that.